The Balance Between Guilt and Evil

Every bad thing he ingests triggers guilt, every toke, every line, every drink, every pill, every greasy cheeseburger or slice of pizza makes him feel weak and worthless, makes him hate himself, makes him feel like a total failure, like he’s letting himself and everybody else down and that, worst of all, he will end up like his mother. But the urge is just too strong. It creeps up and out of him and grabs him by the throat and looks him right in the eyes and all of a sudden he is staring back at that familiar monster and he has no choice but to take the monsters hand and head down the party path once more. Sometimes he’s gone for days, sometimes longer, and when he returns, it’s never for very long, because life without the bad things is just way too hard… and way too boring.